For the past three years, my life has been measured in segments of time that look a bit like this: Fall down, get up. Take a mountain. Fall down, get up. Go backwards. Turn around. Take another mountain. Fall down, get up. Go backwards. Experience intense joy. Fall down, get up. Get mad at the world. Rest in perfect peace. Fall down, get up. And on and on it has gone.
The first year was mostly trying to kick cancer's butt. The next two have been living with the fallout of trying to kick cancer's butt. No one really tells you what you're in for when they tell you what it will take to kick cancer's butt. Oh they tell you the steps you'll take. They just don't warn you what life might look like as you're kicking said butt and after you hope the butt has been kicked. For me, that has meant two years of battling infections and pain and overall feeling pretty crappy. It also led me to make some decisions about what my body can manage and what it can't. As of today, after changing some meds, stopping my chemo pill, going through more surgery, and getting back in to OT/PT, I am hoping with every ounce of hope in my being that I've turned a corner. Please God, let it be.
Side note - I can now eat grapefruit. So really, all is well.
The gratitude I feel over entering a new season feeling better is overwhelming. I do not take this gift of better health lightly. I have friends who are bravely battling recurrence and my heart breaks for what they are having to endure. And so I pray.
My creative world feels like it is bursting at the seams. It hasn't always felt like that, so again, gratitude abounds. I have clarity about my writing I haven't had in a while, and feel more purposeful and peaceful about it than I ever have. Opportunity and community don't necessarily look like I though they would, but in all honestly, they look like my heart needs them to, and that is a beautiful thing.
I am about to unveil a project I have been working on for more than six years with two dear friends, Lee Black and Tony Wood. How this creative work has come to be is a story in itself, and one I am beyond excited to share with you. But patience, readers. That story is coming. Very, very soon.
I'm diving back in to podcasting with new episodes beginning to drop next week. The episodes are timely as you will hear when you listen. So please listen. :)
I am also making myself more available to come alongside creatives who want to do purposeful work. If that's you, please reach out. My personal mission statement is: To do creative work that inspires and equips others to do their creative work. If you would like someone to come alongside you and assist in your creative journey, I would love to be that person.
So, here's to healing and dreaming and working and creating and eating ridiculous amounts of grapefruit. Today is gonna be a good day.